The White Laili

By MZ

The White “Laili” is about a young pretty woman named Laili, who was married to Hadi, a man with average appearance and way of living who actually uses black magic to make Laili subjects to him and loves him the way he does. The whole story shows how innocent Laili is - believing every word that comes from her husband, having no prejudice towards her husband at all. Their lives as a married couple are dreamy, full of love but then an event occurred, causing chaos to Laili’s life. The occurrence of that tragedy disassembles the secret that Hadi is trying to hide. The story ends with the shifting of the plot, where Laili acts like she knows nothing when she already discovers the practice of Hadi.

“Mom”. That sweet voice is here again. My child, she is back. My sweet child,

…

In a peaceful village where everyone minding their own business, there lived a newly-married couple in a musty house with a chilly, dark hallways and dusty furniture that would creep up everyone who steps into it. Not yet talking about the weird noises from the attic, the creaking floorboards when it was stepped on, and those whistling in the windows - it is mysterious, like the whistle of a human. However, despite living in that humble house (the only inheritance from the parents of the wife, and not to forget an old bicycle), they were madly in love with one another as only death can tear them apart.

“My dear Laili, I am going to the paddy field. Make sure to never let anyone in while I am at work”, says Hadi, the husband with a worry on his face - well, it is their first time to be apart even though the paddy field is not that far. Hadi carries the kandaran or people call it as tokeng buluh (something made from bamboo used to carry the weeds of the seedbed to the paddy field) and walks away, disappearing from the sight of Laili.

To add, Laili has always been the target of other men in the village. Due to her beauty, it is safe to say that one glance is all it takes to fall in love with her. Laili has silky black long, wavy hair with a sweet lily smell on it because she has a habit of putting the lily flowers onto her bun or at the back of her ears. Her fair skin is flawless, with a red flush on both of her cheeks enhanced her beauty even more. Laili is a very soft kind of person, the one who will always listen, and one who will melt all of the burdens carried when someone looks at her. Basically, Laili is perfect in the eyes of the villagers - everyone likes her, the elders, the girls, the boys, and even the kids.

While waiting for her husband to get home from work, Laili takes that chance to wander around the house. There is not much to see - not a really great view for sightseeing but it is her house, so she wants to see what she has around. As she walks down her creaking stairs that have few holes on it, she can see piles of water spinach at the back of her house. She is so excited that she walks so fast, kind of jogging to get the water spinach. After she is done with her water spinach, she gets up to get into the house but when she turns her small body around, she sees an unusual, eerie hut deep into the forest - just like the one that people always had in the farm. So, she thinks that maybe there is a farm belonging to someone in the forest behind her house and she just gets into the house without being prejudiced about the hut.

If only she knows that what is in the hut is what will ruin her life, if only she did…

“I hope my husband will like my cooking”, Laili talks to herself, nervously thinking that her husband might not like her cooking. Even though Laili has been trained to cook since a child, she is somehow scared to let someone else, other than her family, taste her dishes.

Hours passed by, Laili sat down in front of her door on the old wooden balcony after she cooked, while looking at the sky. The evening sun cast long shadows on the ground. The slanting rays of the setting sun gave a warm orange tinge to the sky. She knows it is a sign for her husband to get home. As she was immersed in the beauty of the sky, she heard footsteps from the narrow, gloomy path along between the bushes in her yard.

“Laili, I’m home”. Her husband appeared with a big smile on his face, showing his white teeth with two fangs on the right and left side of his line of teeth.

“Welcome home, husband. I’m waiting for you, wash your hands first and I’ll prepare the food for you”, Laili replies also with a smile showing that she is happy that her husband is back, and some sort of showing respect towards the husband.

“You cooked?”, asked the husband. “But, we only had half a sack of rice, that is all I can afford, my love”. Hadi continues with a sad expression on his face, maybe feeling guilty for not being able to provide more for his wife.

“It’s okay, I found water spinach at the back of the house. I only cooked plain porridge and stir-fried water spinach, hope it can suit your taste buds”.

They sit down on the tikar mengkuang, a mat made from the process of weaving mengkuang leaves, and eat together while talking about their days. Hadi talks about what happened at the paddy field - where he was being praised for marrying Laili. Most people say that Hadi is one lucky man, because he gets to marry the prettiest girl in the village when he is not very good-looking. But, the action and his efforts to get Laili made the wife fall deeply in love with him.

They hear the sound of azan not far from their house, not so loud but clear in their ears. They finished eating and quickly got ready to perform congregational prayer. In Islam, married couples are encouraged to perform prayers together to make sure their marriage is God-centred. Hadi leads the salah (prayer) while Laili follows as a makmum, orderly then the husband recites a very touching, meaningful dua asking God to bless their marriage.

Month after month, the sparks of their marriage remain the same, as the first day. But, this happy couple is not yet to be blessed with the existence of a little angel who will ruin their peaceful nights. Laili is bored, for staying at home alone without anyone accompanying her when the husband is so busy with work. Hadi does two or three jobs at one time to make sure he provides the best for his family. Suddenly, the bulb in her mind got switched on - she has an idea to get a job, maybe being a maid at the house of the villagers.

Laili is so excited about her idea that she anxiously waits for Hadi to get home to ask for his permission. As soon as she sees Hadi, she runs towards him barefooted with a very wide smile on her face.

“Everything is good today, my love?”

“Yes, yes! Actually, I want to ask for your permission”, says Laili with shiny eyes, showing the excitement in her.

“What is it, my love? All your wishes shall I grant full heartedly”.

“I want to work too, if only you agree. I felt so lonely being at home all day, please allow me, abang?”. Laili begs with the cute face of her, a little bit whining to make her husband sympathise and agree.

Hadi seems restless - he is not so cruel to trap his wife in the old house by herself everyday like an animal in a cage. But, he is also not cruel to let the wife do the hard labor because he knows that Laili wants to help him provide for the family. Hadi is a very caring and loving husband who always thinks about his wife first before anyone else. He is scared with the thoughts that anything bad can happen to his wife, and most importantly the fact that her wife will be the target of flirty men around the village, again.

However, looking at those two shiny, brownish-round eyes in front of him makes him feel guilty for not giving the permission she deserves. He feels like carrying a sack of stones in his mind because a new burden was added, which is to always overthink the safety of his wife. With a heavy heart, Hadi finally agrees, well who would be able to resist the cuteness of Laili?

Five months later…

Laili is now happy with her job as a maid at the house of senior villagers for quite some time now and receives salaries few times already - even though she only gets a very little amount of wages, she is extremely grateful with the jobs. She feels satisfied as she can help her husband to provide for them, as she knows how hard and tiring her husband’s jobs must be.

One day, Laili notices something unusual with her body - it feels like the body keeps on getting heavier, like she is carrying another person with her. She does not feel as energetic as always, and their excitement to get her job done plunged rapidly. Actually, she can sense some good news from her body because she is experiencing an irregular menstrual cycle - to

put it easily, she has not had her period for months now. Just to be confirmed, she goes to the bidan (a midwife - traditional ‘obstetrician-gynaecologist’ who specialises in the health of women and pregnancy).

“Congratulations, Laili. The time has finally come, you’re 23 weeks pregnant. Make sure to take very good care of yourself and the baby”. Mak Mah is beyond happy on behalf of Laili and her husband because she knows how much Laili wants a child.

The clear pearls of happiness dripping down her reddish-plump cheeks. Finally after waiting for almost a year, a little angel is sent down by God to colour the lives of her and Hadi. She is very grateful that she cannot stop shedding tears, she feels like running to her husband to share this good news. But, there are a lot of things to be settled first at the villagers’ houses so she gets back to those houses and gets her job done. She works very fast like lightning on a rainy day.

The weather was gloomy that day. The skies have greyish shades on it with no orangey-yellow of the sun at all on the palette. Laili continues working until the end, settling the workload for a week at once - with the mindset that she wants to be off from working for a week to rest, and so the baby. She finishes her chores at half past eight at night and suddenly, it is raining - luckily it is not that heavy so she rides her creaking black old bicycle with rusty stains in the rain.

The usual path she uses seems a bit odd that night, with the street lights becoming so dim that she barely sees the road in the rain and no single shadows of humans there, it is a bit scary. She presumes everyone is tired and not going out that day because it is raining so she dares herself, stepping the pedals of the bicycle pretending to be brave and sailing through the darkness of the rainy night. Without her knowing, there is a pair of eyes behind the bushes observing, following her steps.

Luckily, she gets home safely but her husband is not there. The lights are off and only the small obsolete pelita (the oil lamp) is on to light the stairs.

“Maybe he went somewhere and was caught up in his job, let’s just take a shower first”, Laili says to herself while taking off and putting her wet clothes in a bemban basket (a basket mostly used to keep clothes before being washed) and steps to her bathroom outside the house.

On her way to take a shower, she smells something - a very bad, unknown smell, it is like the smell of smoke but it is not, it can also be said as the smell of carcass but it is also not. The smell is just indescribable and not just that, she hears something strange - like someone looking like a man wearing all black is doing something there.

There?

Yes, there, at the eerie hut behind her house.

Laili got goosebumps but her overwhelmed feeling of being pregnant and the joy, the excitement of her telling Hadi about it surmount the odd feeling she had about the hut. So, she turns her back and continues her unsettled business. After a while, her husband gets home - getting soaked because of the heavy rain, she waits for him to take a bath and they sit together to have dinner.

“I have a good news for you”

“What is it, my wife?”

“Guess what, be ready to get super busy and stay up all night after this because God answers my prayers - He gives us the little creation, I’m pregnant!”. Laili is so excited and overjoyed with the existence of the baby in her womb.

Silence hits, the face of her husband remains the same - serious, no feeling. Wait, is Hadi not excited at all?

“Are you okay, abang? Do you hear what I’ve said just now?”

Only then Hadi smiles, he gives a really wide smile to her wife. He says, “yes my wife, I’m stunned and speechless with the unexpected news of happiness”. Little that she knows, the husband in front of her is pretending. He pretends to be happy with the child her wife carries.

Laili reaches her husband’s hand with her white soft hand, stroking it slowly. She is happy that her husband felt the same, she knows and believes that the man who she called as a husband will be the best father ever to her child, just like how he was the husband ever for her from day one up until this moment.

Weeks passed, she feels like these weeks that have passed since she knows she is carrying a living creature inside her are the best days of her life. With the loving treatment from Hadi toward her and the baby, the patience of her husband fulfilling all her cravings, the comfort that Hadi provides; all are precious. To add, everyday as her tummy expands, she can feel the movement of her baby, it is so overwhelming. She still cannot believe the fact that she is going to be a mother.

However, one day…

“Husband, I can’t feel the baby. Is the baby okay? Let’s go to the bidan right now, please? I’m scared”.

Something happened. The baby suddenly becomes not active like usual, Laili does not feel the small feet kicking her belly anymore. She is panicking because the baby usually is super hyper when the Mama touches them but not today, the baby is silent.

“Dum!”

“Dum!”

“Dum!”

The banging on the door continues until the midwife opens it, to be shocked with the condition of Laili. This poor girl, she is really in pain. An hour later, the midwife comes out from the room and has a serious talk with Hadi.

“I have something to say, your wife had lost the baby and I’m sorry, I cannot do anything to help. The baby is gone just like that. I don’t know, this is quite strange. I’ve never encountered anything like this. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry for you both”.

Mak Mah sympathises with this young couple because she knows that Laili has been expecting a child since forever - Laili always talks about babies, plays with the grandchildren of Mak Mah like they are her. Hadi falls down on his knees hearing that news, his heart aches - like someone stabs and slices it with a very sharp knife. He is very sad that his valuable tears (a man’s tears) fall down his cheeks. The feeling is indescribable, like there is no word in this world that can be used to describe that heart-breaking feeling. But, one thing he can be sure about is, he needs to be strong for Laili.

No, wait. He needs to keep pretending for the sake of his secret from being discovered by Laili.

Laili is not Laili anymore. She changes, from a happy-go-lucky person to someone who is silent. From someone who is rich with a smile to someone who has a serious face all the time. The most notable, from someone who always talks about her day with her husband, Laili becomes someone who loves and prefers to talk to herself more. Somehow, it looks like she is having postpartum depression - a mental condition after childbirth or miscarriage.

…

“Mom”. That sweet voice is here again. My child, she is back. My sweet child, my beautiful baby. Laili woke up from her not-so-called-sleep and followed the voice of the child.

“Mom, here”, the voice continues until Laili finds herself in front of the hut - the one that she found at the back of her house. She looks around, “where are you, my baby?” she shouts while looking around. She shouts and shouts but only her voice is there, because only she is there. She sat down crying in the hut.

…

“Laili! Laili! Laili!”

Laili wakes up to the voice of her husband, sweating like crazy and finding out that she is dreaming - the same dream almost every night.

She bawled her eyes out, crying again and again. Her same routine every night.

“I’ve always dreamed about being at the hut, the voice always leads me to the hut. What is the connection between my baby and the hut? Why does it have to be that creepy hut?” asks Laili while a bit shouting to her husband.

“My love, don’t worry. I’ll do anything to make you feel better. We got this, we are in this together. Now, I want you to listen to me. Maybe the loss of our baby is a good thing for us, maybe we are not yet ready to be parents. Yes it is odd that the baby is just gone like that, but it is the willpower of God. This is our fate, we should move on forward and not question Him. It might be that we need more time to enjoy the life of marriage. I know you’re sad, but me too, I feel the same. But, for how long should we stay like this? Who are we to fight against the fate of God? About the hut, maybe it is just your imagination. You’re always scared of that hut, you always said that it gives you the gut feeling. There is nothing there, my love. I’ve been there, I know. Believe me, please?”

Laili feels annoyed with her husband so she keeps her lips sealed.

“Why can’t he understand me? Does he love me? Doesn’t he love our child?”, blabbering the voice in her heart.

But, after she calmed down and did some thinking. She sees the rational in her husband's words. She realises that she is just merely a human being who has no rights and power to go against God.

Laili finally nods, implying that she agrees and wants to try to move forward with Hadi because she believes that God has a better plan for her future and that child is waiting for them in heaven.

Two years later…

Laili smiles at her husband, as a sign that she is thankful for the gift given to her. She looks at the handful of red roses that are freshly hand-picked at the garden in their yard. She turns her face to the voice of the most loved person in her life, Hadi.

Laili gets so much better, she becomes the best version of herself. She still keeps the dark, troublesome memory of her and remembers the child until today.

She is grateful for whatever she has today - the better her, the better life, and most importantly, for the husband who completes her.

The night is aglow with the pale crescent moon shining like a silvery claw in the sky. Hadi hugs Laili from the back, while Laili is combing her shiny-silky black hair.

“My love, thank you for believing in me and giving me the chance for me to bring the old you back. I love you so much that only death will tear us apart. Thank you for coping with the past and moving forward with me.”

Laili touches Hadi’s face with both of her hands, she looks deep into his eyes. She is very grateful to have Hadi by his side, they both smile and decide to let go of what has happened before. Laili rests her head on Hadi’s broad shoulder - feeling safe that Hadi is there to protect her. Hadi and Laili promise to be with each other forever and only focus on the days ahead of them, even though they are not yet to be blessed with a child.

It is not like God does not choose them to be parents but Hadi chooses not to be one. The secret remains silent… until the end, it seems like Laili has no idea that Hadi has practised the black magic on her. Actually, Hadi has a delusional jealousy problem that he always thinks Laili will flirt with another man, having an affair behind his back and falls in love with a better man compared to him. Well, Laili is the prettiest girl alive in that village and compared to him, they are like The Beauty and The Beast. So, to make sure Laili loves him the way he is madly in love with her, he tends to use the black magic as a stepping stone to have Laili all by himself so he aborts the baby using black magic too: he just does not want to share her with anyone. As for the hut, it is full of her belongings - the clothes, the hairs, nails, everything that can be used and that man she saw is her husband. But, Laili will never know…

Or else she knows because she went to the hut the morning after?