Other’s shoes

Art by @selena park on Pinterest

by Namiyo

Edited by Namiyo

“You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view — until you climb into his skin and walk around in it.” — To Kill a Mockingbird

It is easy to create assumptions without any concrete foundation of the tree of judgements people carelessly grew under their nose. In tandem with the alarming rise of terminally online presences, humans in their digital forms, first impression turns into negative assumptions as if perceiving positivity is a scarcity humanity could not afford. Prioritising their digital world and presence is one thing but the increasing trend of individualism is another. Living in a society and born as a socially literate species, at most, people are used to perceiving their way of living as the definite way of surviving everyday life. Which, unfortunately, is not the same case for some or even most.

In the famous literary work, To Kill a Mockingbird written by Harper Lee, it raises questions of morality and ethical way of living. How much does someone understand the person next to him if not half or less than what the other person had told him? It is honestly rather rhetoric than a genuine question wrapped with answers. Nonetheless, no one can fully comprehend the extent of what someone else has gone through if not being in their shoes and walking in them.

However, even the shoes would not completely fit. They will either be too tight or too loose, creating an illusion that no one could actually relive the experience of the other, but the effort matters.

Circling back to the issue at hand, since the inevitable happened and people nowadays lack comprehension skills and empathy towards other people, there are three ways that may be practiced or implemented in pursuit of becoming more humane and tangible with reality.

Analyse before judgement

Meeting someone for the first time, people tend to stick close to their first impression of the new person they met. But do not linger long, instead, try to initiate more conversation with the other person. Listen to their voice and body language. Every single quirk and distinction of them in comparison to yourself or other people you know. The more you know someone directly without a third person, the more you are aware about the person as their own agency. No pretense or lie, simply, exposing oneself to the other person’s colour and shape like one is learning a new colour or object. Surely, distinction can be derived and one will see their first impression and the second is not parallel, for better or worse.

Listening is one of the vital components in communication

Talking about communication, one will inevitably think of talking or conversing and while they are true, it’s not necessarily the only correct answer. In communication, listening and comprehending also matters. Unfortunately no one can relate to the other person’s life except from soaking themselves in their narrations and flashbacks. Hence, intentional listening matters. Comprehension matters. Instead of undermining a person’s life or choice of living, one should sit down with the other person and open their ears to the truth of reality. Wrong key will stay unfit to a wrong hole. One’s perception of life will never be the same as another person’s perception of life.

Ignorant is partially not a bliss

The infamous quote of “ignorant is a bliss” mayhaps help in certain situations but in regard to other human beings' unfortunate life circumstances, it is futile. Ignorant is not a bliss when one disregards someone’s failure to uplift their living conditions or circumstances as lazy when there is more than meets the eyes. These people find it convenient to misplace their judgement because they are simply more fortunate and empathy is sacred, comprehension is at the verge of collapsing. Society loses its vital component as a community of intelligence when they succumb to the individualistic lifestyles and stand in their own shoes long enough it turns worn-out. Too ego to step out of their own comfort and taste a different air. Discard ignorance when other people’s hardships or life is the centre of the topic.

All in all, no flowers grew in one night. They need sunlight, suitable soil, and an adequate amount of water to strive and bloom. More or less like humans. In pursuit of a better society, everyone should seek the importance of caring towards other individuals and understand their hassle and pain even if they are hard to be understood. After all, wearing the wrong size of shoes will make you in pain or trip over your own legs. But experience matters, and so does life.